My daughters and I have always played "remember when." It's a fun game where usually it digresses to silliness, but to me it is an oral history of our family and times together. For them, their history begins 16-19 years ago. I feel it is important for them to learn about the special things that I shared with family members who they have only known for a short time. I am thankful that I have a close family who also relishes in the people who came before us and who want to preserve the family stories and traditions we have now.
One of my earliest sound related memories is of my Aunt Connie, who is my mother's sister. She was 17 when I was born. So when I was a toddler/preschooler, she was my idol and I followed her everywhere. She was a lifeguard at the local pool and also a swimmer in water shows. I adored her; still do, in fact. When I was tired, she used to hold me and rub my arms. She would sing to me, "Say, Say, oh playmate, come out and play with me...." I never made it through the end of the song. It is a tradition that has been passed on. I sang it to my daughters, and my aunt has sang it to every baby born in this family. Something about Aunt Connie singing and babies just puts the world right again.
As I outgrew the snuggling and singing, I made other memories. I am glad that I have these, because they have to do with my maternal grandmother. She has dementia, and sometimes doesn't remember exactly who I am. She knows I belong to my mother, but doesn't remember my name, It kills me that she has lost all recollection of the wonderful things we did together as I was growing up. My grandmother was a genuine 50's housewife. She went to the beauty shop every week, cooked three meals a day, ironed everything in site, made magical things on her sewing machine, sang, played the piano, and was always dressed to impress. On a side note, I literally cannot think of a time that lady didn't have on stockings. Kinda makes me giggle now to think about it! While most people recall a powdery scent when it comes to their grandmothers, I have to admit the smell of onions makes me cry. Not because of the usual onion in the eye, but because my memories of Grandma Mary are so closely tied to onion. There was rarely a time she made something savory that it didn't have one in the recipe. It became that no matter the amount of washing or lotions applied, her hands smelled like the delicious veggie. I relate having my hair brushed away from my face and the smell of onions as a normal thing.
The last and sweetest thing is my mother. I am so blessed to still have all three amazing women in my life. But of course Mom is always, you know, the Queen. So many wonderful things bring Mom to mind. I have to say that Caress soap is at the top of the list for me. Many of you know I work in a grocery store. A lady purchased some Caress a few evenings ago, and I was so overcome I nearly cried. Is it bad to admit to your customer that they inadvertently made you home sick? I explained to her that my mother used to scrub her face with that soap and it immediately takes me back to bed time kisses and middle of the night comfort. The sweet smell of your mother's skin pressed to your cheek. How can you not fall in love with that memory?
There are so many awful things out here in the world. Yet, there are so many amazing memories to guide us, to comfort, to inspire. It is easy to bring a smile to another's face when you share your sweetest things. Whether it's a child's song, a strong vegetable, or a sweet and favorite smell, these are treasures to be loved and shared. Life's sweetest things.
Until we meet again,
Sweet Steph Starr
